Today is Mother’s Day. I thought I’d assume a fresh view of this day, a different approach from the historic aspects of this American holiday or the shopping events in which many are immersed. Not that “mom” doesn’t deserve the attention. But, in talking to those in my circles this past week, what particularly caught my attention was that our personal Mother’s Day experiences are not all alike.
Neither are all mothers or maternal relationships the same. I invite you to take a trip down memory lane to your childhood. What do you remember of Mother’s Day traditions? Compare that with your Mother’s Day activities today in your adult or advanced years.
I’ll start with a glimpse of my own boyhood at my maternal grandmother’s huge dining room table on that special day. After church, my parents and their siblings gathered at grandma’s house bearing flowers, plants, pastry, candy and all sorts of gifts. We’d then join in a big Italian Sunday dinner. Cooking was a really big operation then. Grandma had seven daughters and a son but she was in charge of the cooking. As the years went by, she would focus on the supervision of her daughters, ensuring that her plans were properly executed. But it was always her kitchen. Oops. Scusi, I meant to say, cucina!
This took place during the ‘30s and early WWII years in an Italian-American family in Brooklyn, NY.
As I grew up, we held onto many of those traditions, though gradually easing up on the work for my mother with barbecues we prepared, always bringing the traditional gifts.
Later with five children of our own, all males, including the family dog, would provide age and species appropriate assistance in rising early and preparing breakfast for my wife, their mom.
As the years rolled by, habits and culture changed. Our children began taking their mom out to dinner. In the past 25 years, they have organized a brunch at home or at a restaurant, where all of us can be together and none of us have to do the work. Flowers, plants, special cards, and gifts continue to be fun for all. We especially enjoy now having our now adult grandchildren with us.
Through stories others have told me, it is clear that American family traditions of Mother’s Day vary based somewhat on region of origin and/or ancestral ethnicity.
Finally, I thought of motherhood today in our third millennium. Not to wax affectedly, but to keep in mind the reality of the diverse situations of women today, my thoughts turned to those with biological or adopted children; single, working, professional and breadwinner moms; foster mothers and grandmothers or relatives raising children without a parent. This aroused in me a renewed esteem for all mothers and would-be mothers in this world, the human source of our species.
Can’t resist mentioning the connection between mothers, as the ‘root source’ of all us, and how that relates to Appleseed, the name I chose for this column, representing the significance of apple seeds and apples, a source of Southington’s historic roots here in Apple Valley.
Columnist and community service advocate Dick Fortunato welcomes comments at dick617@gmail.com
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